World class procrastinator

I am a world class procrastinator. For instance, right now, I have a very specific task I should be doing, and it has nothing to do with this blog. However, I don't want to do it. So, I read a few blogs, and now I'm typing one. I also want to draw a picture of a clock to illustrate this entry (if it's here, I did it.) Probobly going to happen.

I don't think procrastination is always bad. In fact, I know that if I put a time limit on my procrstination, I feel better when I'm done and am able to focus better.

So- procrastinate away. Just make sure you have a list of what really needs to get done so you remember what to go back to.

Need to simplify

Just a warning- there some changes coming up here and on my other two sites: Pilatesformommies.net and ThePilatesLifestyle.com. I need to simplify, and, minimally, I'm going to combine my umpteen blogs into one. I'm going to keep Lily's separate because, after all, it's hers, but the whole split personality thing is getting to me. More to come.

My butterfly

It's been a very, very frustrating day. Actually, that's not true. I'm tired and being a bit overly dramatic. But I am just frustrated in general. Frustrated enough, in fact, that the fact that I can't figure out why the photo I just tried to upload is vertical instead of horizontal just figures and I'm going to leave it. But, oh well. The point is, I'm really frustrated and feeling really sorry for myself, but with children's church songs stuck in my head. The ones I sang, not the ones my daughter sings. I decided wanted to color. And when I got my crayons out, I drew the songs. And the drawing is nice. It's a pretty picture that reminds me that "Happiness is to be forgiven, living the life that you've been given." and "I just thank you Father for making me, Me."

Yes, things are not falling into place like I wish they would. But apparently God has a reason for that. I'm not sure what it is, but the overriding message of my day has been that God is my happiness. That's what I need to hold on to and remember.

And by the way- I forgot just how amazing oil crayons are. I first played with them at camp when I was 14, bought myself a set 3 years ago and have made, counting tonight- 4 drawings. Which means I'm averaging one a year. But I learned to paint last week and I colored this week. I think I might be an artist.

April Goals

Remember my goals? During the month of March I felt a bit lost because I didn't sit down and review them, so I felt like I was forgetting to do something. However, I only had one major goal due in March, and I accomplished it. The first draft of my book is done! I didn't accomplish any of my other ongoing goals, but that's okay. I think it's good to have just one or two big ones each month now so that I don't get too discouraged when I don't accomplish them.

My goals for April are: Finish Staircase Story and Plant Garden.

I'm hoping to also decide what is next for me. I want to streamline my life. Not sure what that means yet, but will share when I do.

Book Review: The Gospel According to Lost

I've been a Christian my whole life, and a dedicated Lost follower since the first episode. The Biblical analogies in the show haven't been lost on me, so I was very interested to read this book. It turned out not to be my cup of tea, but I could definitely see using it to create a discussion group.
After the initial introduction section, the book goes through character by character, equating them to their Biblical counterparts, and analyzing their actions through a Christian lens. Some of the analogies fit better than others- for example, equating Hurley to Jacob was a bit of a stretch, but using Sayid to illustrate the Christian view of God’s grace was more natural.
If you haven’t watched the show and plan to, you might not want to read this- it assumes you know everything that has happened through the end of the 6th season and will ruin most of the surprises. If you are into all of the spoiler resources out there, none of the references in this book will likely surprise you. It did help me connect the dots for some details I had forgotten in the 6 or so years since the show began, but since I'm not really into all of the conspiracy stuff it just didn't hold my attention.

I had an orange room too!

I love Naturally Nina's blog. She finds the most adorable and inspiring images. It's just fun to read.

Well, earlier this week she posted pictures of her condo, and I was was struck by how similar her dining area was to the one in our first house (we moved last summer). Check hers out here. Isn't it amazing?

Proof that God is a Man

Matthew 10:30: And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.

If God knows all of the hairs on my head (which I beleive He does, after all, He created them), then he must be a man, because no woman would do this to another woman.

I have thick hair. In both senses: I have a lot of hair, and each strand is very, very thick. It's sort of wavy, sort of straight. Very prone to frizz. Very. I sway back and forth from very, very short, and trying to let it grow out. The longest it's every gotten is about 14 inches- I know because I cut off 12 of it and donated it to Locks of Love. I'm in the growing out phase now, it's almost to my shoulders. It's not quite long enough for a pony tail, but I wanted to do something fun this morning so I pulled what I could up into a barrett at the crown of my head.

The problem is that I did this while it was still wet. Which means that now it's looking like I have the "wet look" aka greasy going on. And I don't, it's just honestly still wet. It will more than likely stay wet until I take it out of the barrett tonight, because my hair is so thick that it doesn't dry when it's bound up. When it was longer, I once french braided it into 2 pigtails that literally stayed wet for two days. Before you think that I'm an unclean person: I showered one morning, braided my hair, and took the braids out the next night when I showered again. My hair was still wet.

I love my hair when it looks good. I just wish it didn't require so much effort!

Kindle for Mac is finally here

I'm so excited about this I had to post it. Here's the link.

Most Amazing Camera Bag Ever

Oh my goodness. I'm finally getting caught up on more than 2 weeks worth of blog reading, and Rockstar Naomi featured these AMAZING camera bags by Jo Totes. I want one. It's not in the budget right now, but if I get an art show I may buy myself one as a celebration. And an encouragement to carry my camera everywhere.

Oh what a night...

What a wonderful night! I got to hang out with my kids- I read Lily 12 books (well, she read me a few of them) fed Austin twice and got to do all of the snuggling that goes with that, and started to carve out my own writing space in the "Reading Room" - our downstairs living room. I realized my desk, although a cheapo from "The Store that Must Not be Named," weighs about a million pounds though so I have to wait for Chris to get home to help me move it downstairs. In the meantime, I am finally uploading some of my photos to Flikr so that I can apply for an art show at my church. I'm kind of excited- I know I'm no professional, but I feel like I have some pretty amazing shots. If I had the money, I would love to get a bunch of them mounted. I can add it to my "if I had money" list.

I'll post the Flikr link as soon as they're all up.

Race Relations

This is a bit random for this blog, but I was just pursuing Facebook and I am amazed at how many of the people I went to high school with are in inter-racial relationships, or have had children with people of different races. Not because I find anything wrong with either of those things, but because it is just so different than the culture we grew up in.

I'm white, and the first time I met a black person I was twelve years old. I remember wondering if her blood was red like mine was, or if it was darker because her skin was darker.

I don't think I grew up racist, I simply grew up ignorant. I know people who have disowned their children because of inter-racial marriages. I once considered dating a black man, but was afraid of what my parents would think (granted he was also 14 years older than me, I was worried about that too.)

All this to say, I am glad that although we grew up very isolated, I'm happy that so many have moved outside of our narrow past.

This is all not as eloquent as I would like, but I've had three glasses of wine tonight :)

Update on February Goals

Somehow it's March. That means it's time to revisit February's goals and make a plan for March. February wasn't the best month for me.

The only one I actually achieved was an artist date.

These are the ones I changed:
I participate in a writing workshop either online or in person. -- So excited about the Open University course I found on iTunes U, but then realized it was all geared towards stage writing. I thought I would still be able to get something out of it, but stopped about 1/3 of the way through when I realized I just wasn't getting much out of it.
By 2/28/2010 I have completed a “Best of” series of photographs and posted it on Flickr.
I have applied for an exhibit with The Village Chapel.--- Changed to 3/15
By February 28 I have completed 10 pieces for etsy store (3 per week)--Tabling this for now- def. still wanting to do it, but waiting until the book is written.
I write one chapter of The Pilates Lifestyle each week. -- Changed to 1/2 per week. Accomplished the revision.

Here is what I didn't accomplish:
I will complete one entire writing project -- didn't happen
I enter at least one writing contest
I write every day.
I write 10 query letters
I post on The Pilates Lifestyle blog every Monday, Wednesday and Friday beginning February 8.
I post on the Pilates for Mommies blog every Tuesday and Thursday starting February 4.


The reason I didn't accomplish as much as I would have likes was because I didn't make a weekly plan. This is absolutely necessary for me. March goals will be up by the end of the week.

I miss you

Dear Blog,

I miss you. I don't know where the last two weeks went, but they are gone. I need to sit down and reflect on all of my February and March goals, but I don't know when I will have the tiem this week. But- I am taking a writing course tomorrow and Thursday night that I'm very much looking forward to.

I hope to be back soon.

Love,
Amanda

What do you mean it's almost 8pm?

My kids went to bed really early tonight- by 6:50 they were both snoring.  I was so excited to have the opportunity to get some writing done tonight!  So I posted a quick story on my Examiner site, my Monday Muscle entry and my Pilates for Mommies entry.  None felt like they took very long, and I was really excited to have some good quality awake time to do some real writing.  While my blog updates upload I check the clock- and it's been an hour!  An hour!  I thought 10 minutes tops.  Not an hour!  AHHHH!  I mean, I know everything I have done tonight has been writing, but it hasn't been writing.  And now the kids are crying.  Grrrrr!  My books will get written somehow!

**Clock from here

Loving Me

I struggle with my self-image. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I just don't like what I see.  I wish I was thinner.  I wish I didn't have the dark circles under my eyes that broadcast to the world that I haven't gotten enough sleep in about three years.  I wish a lot of things.

My daughter loves herself.  She hasn't gotten to that "I wish" thinking yet.  This picture is of her looking into a mirror and literally squealing with delight at what she sees.  She LOVES herself.  She gets dressed in the morning then runs to either me or daddy (whoever didn't help her) and declares "I'm cute!" We brush her hair, she turns around, kisses us and says "I'm pretty!"  

I'm going to start doing that- once I get dressed I'm going to look in the mirror and declare myself cute.  Once my hair has been brushed, I'm going to go find my husband and declare myself pretty.  Because I am gorgeous. Lily tells me a lot how pretty I am. I just need to remind myself sometimes.

I want a hot glue gun

Because I want to make this.  Brooke lives pretty close to me (a few hours) I'm starting to think I need to go meet her. (Picture of Brooke's finished box from her website.)

All better

So, obviously last night I wasn't feeling tip top, I was actually feeling overwhelmed by all that I want to do and the fact that my body requires that I get a certain amount of sleep each night because otherwise I am crabby, or worse, overly emotional.  (I haven't consistantly gotten enough sleep since before my kids were born, but my husband is amazing and he bears the brunt of the midnight (and 1, 2, 3 and 4am) trips to their rooms.) Besides sleep, I also want to spend time cuddling my kids, reading to them and playing with them.  And my husband.  And I have a full time job, and a part time job.  I've got a lot going on.  But,  I am only 28, I have much life left to lead.  I have time. I don't have to do it all now. (I should write that on a neon post it and put it on my computer!)

My Blog List- Part 1

I thought it would be fun to publish a list of the blogs I read, maybe you'll find soemthing you like! (These are in the order they appear in my Google Reader, it would be just too hard to rank them.)  I follow 25 blogs, so I'm going to split this up and just do 5 every Tuesday for the next 5 weeks so you don't get overwhelemed.

Sending Postcards: Alex and Mina are on a trip around the world and are graciously allowing us all to live vicariously through them. 

About.com Pilates: Marguerite Ogle writes all about Pilates- including interviews with master instructors, exercise demos and current trends.

Creatuitive Coaching: Entrepreneure Ana gives tips and inspiration for getting the most out of your job, whether you work at a typical 9-5 or have started your own company.

Editor Unleashed: Good, practical writing tips and advice

Hip Tranquil Chick: I owe Kimberly Wilson a lot- this was the first blog I ever read, the first podcast I ever subscribed to.  She introduced me to folks like Julia Cameron and Anne Lamont, and inspires me to do everything I want (because I feel like when she gets an idea, she goes for it, head on, full out.) 

Happy Reading,

Planning

Are you ever afraid that you have missed "it" but you don't know what "it" is?  That's the way I feel sometimes- I think a lot of the times "it" is my twenties, even though I have two years of twenties left.  Now, before I go on, I need to caveat this all with this statement: I love my life.  I love my kids, my husband and my house.  These are not things I'm wishing I didn't have or feel like are tying me down.

But...

I am so determined and so driven, almost like I'm afraid to let the wheels stop turning because of what the consequences might be, that I miss out on what is happening right here and now.  I miss out on cuddling with my kids because while I'm trying to rock them to sleep I read blogs on my phone, I miss out on relaxing with my husband because I am doing something else.  I see other people in their mid twenties flying off to go on vacations and cruises and wonder, #1, where do they get the money, and #2, why can't I do that?  Why am I so responsible?

But then I look around at my beautiful daughter and my adorable son, my handsome husband and cute dog and I see what they don't have.  I remember coming home at 3 and 4 am during college alone and lonely, and I'm glad that is no longer an issue.

So, all I guess I'm trying to say is that sometimes I feel like I missed out on something, but more often i feel bad for those who don't have what I do.

Amazing Blog

Okay- so I follow more blogs than I can keep up with, but I just added another one- Color Me Katie.  I found her based on an interview that Brooke at Playing Grown Up did. (BTW, Brooke's blog makes me feel so much better at wanting to stay young, even though I'm a 28 year old mom!) Katie does AMAZING, INSPIRING, ADORABLE art projects, and then shows the readers how to replicate them.  The picture is from her Chalk Walk.  You have got to check her out!